On Sunday I was so miserable that I said to Papa, ‘If only the (darn ship would sink!’ Papa laughed at me and went to play skat with Mr Simonius and Dr Staehelin from Basel till eleven that night. Suddenly at four minutes to 12, I woke up and for a moment even forgot my seasickness. Without thinking, I dressed warmly and ran with Papa to the upper deck to try and find out what the jolt was all about.
On deck we met up with barely 10 people, amongst them by coincidence both our Basel friends, who made fun of me, saying that it seemed to take an iceberg to bring me back on deck. We all looked down on the water rather sheepishly, and then decided to go back to bed as there was no one around that showed any signs of fear. Then we met a gentlemen below who was putting on his lifevest, but I was feeling so seasick, that although the engines had stopped, I lay down again and just left the cabin door open. I relaxed somewhat thinking back on a conversation I had with our steward the day before, I had asked him if the lifevests, lying on top of my closet, were good for anything. He had told me the Titanic could never sink, that even the greatest leak would do no harm because of the watertight walls that would let down in case of an emergency.
Within half a minute Papa was back in the doorway and said that the steward was helping Mama into a lifevest. Papa helped me buckle up he contraption, and because of the extreme cold, I put my evening coat on over it, and then the three of us went back up to the upper deck, where to our amazement we saw about 30 people standing around a lifeboat. ‘Oh dear me, this is it!’ that’s all I thought. I saw two men lift Mama into it, and immediately it was my turn to be shoved inside and I hoped Papa would follow. Then I heard the cursed ‘Ladies first’, and I was so terrified that Papa would not get a seat, that I screamed at the top of my lunge, ‘Come, otherwise I’m getting back out!’ although of course I most certainly could not have gotten out again. Mama was as upset as I was, as were all the other women who were sitting in the lifeboat with us. Then the sailors let a few men in, but Papa, instead of coming, kept on call ‘Goodbye.’ He Still wanted to wait. Thank God there were no more women there, and so Papa came too. Then we were told to hold very still, and now we were lowered rather quickly the 30 metres from the upper deck. Everything was handled with the utmost order and calm by the crew, and we the passengers also barely spoke a word.