I think you may be judging Lightoller too harshly.
Class distinction aboard ship was no different, and in fact, an important part of discipline and authority.
I doubt very seriously that White Star spent more than they had to for crew accommodations in New York, given that the line terminated crew pay as the stern disappeared into the Atlantic. I'm certain the hotel was the cheapest the White Star could get away with, and I am reasonably certain that the crew was familiar with this sort of thing. A bed and a bowl of soup would have been about all they expected.
On the other hand, as an officer I, too, would expect a measure of distinction in accommodations between officer and crew. For the White Star to fail in this is to undermine the relationship between them.
Reducing an officer to the status of a steward or fireman would have been damaging to the line and the weight of Lightoller's testimony.
It was a period in time where class distinctions and appearances were far more important than today, when egalitarian gestures and blurred boundaries between those in authority and those over whom authority is practiced have made enforcement and respect a difficult thing to maintain.